Although corny, every book worm secretly loves cheesy book puns and pickup lines. It’s one of those things that only readers understand, but every time we hear a reference to our favorite books or reading, we smile inside. So here’s a whole list of them for you to enjoy. Don’t worry. We won’t tell anyone if you laugh.
#1
Is your name Scarlett? Because when I saw you, my heart was gone with the wind.
#2
The podiatry book used footnotes while the proctology book used endnotes.
#3
The little boy was so full of energy that every book he read was a hyper text.
#4
An accountant for a restaurant has to be sure the books are not cooked.
#5
Once I tried illustrating currency books for a living. I never drew a dime.
#6
I like books, you like books, why don’t we start writing the story of us?
#7
Baby, if you were words on a page, you’d be what they call fine print!
#8
I was reading the book of numbers yesterday, and I realized I don’t have yours.
#9
I know I’m not supposed to judge a book by its cover, but one glance at you and I’m already interested.
#10
Charles Dickens might have given you Great Expectations, but I can meet them.
#11
Hey cutie, I Sense you have a lot of Sensibility. Was that too Austen-tatious of me to point out?
#12
Sorry! My weekend is so busy. It’s all booked!
#13
Dinosaurs didn’t read. Now they’re extinct.
#14
I was just diagnosed with IBS: Impulsive Book-Reading Syndrome. #15
What building has the most stories? The library.
#16
What do you do if your pet starts eating your novel?
Take the words right out of his mouth!
#17
What does the ghost always need more books?
He goes through them too quickly.
#18
I wish you would open up to me.
#19
The policeman said if I didn’t pay my library fine he would have to book me.
#20
When she made Mario Puzo’s novels required reading for her class, she made him an author they couldn’t refuse.
#21
Have you read the bestseller about teleportation?
It’s bound to get you somewhere.
#22
A second glance is all that’s needed for a book re-view.
#23
The book about teflon contained no frictional characters.
#24
I was going to buy a best seller on phobias, but I was afraid it wouldn’t help me.
#25
I once read a book about singularity. It really sucked me in.
#26
The student was an aggressive learner — he hit the books.
#27
I read this book about Mount Everest. It was quite the cliffhanger.
#28
The book of incantations was useless. The author had failed to run a spell check.
#29
A tome fell on my head the other day … I can only blame my shelf!
#30
A young man visited the librarian every day so he could get into her good books.
#31
We could make such a beautiful library together.
#32
You are like a good novel — I just can’t get you out of my head.
#33
If I had to make a Patronus, I’d just think of you.
#34
If I had a flower for every time I’ve thought of you, I’d have a Secret Garden.
#35
Are you a library book? Because I am checking you out.
#36
I just read a textbook about stockholm syndrome. The first couple chapters were awful but by the end I loved it.
#37
Ereader: The same story again?
Book: It’s the only one I have.
#38
During the rainy season, I spread out large books for my guests to wipe their feet on. These are the tomes that dry men’s soles.
#39
I’ve never enjoyed paper backs: Their blend of wooden characters and watered-down plots makes them pulpy.
#40
The high school music teacher was quite controversial. He told his students to read band books.
#41
A book called Current Trends in Wiring Your House turned out to be a shocking failure.
#42
The author wasn’t pleased to see a review of his book on cappuccinos. The review said the book was all froth and no substance.
#43
I’m reading a novel about mazes; I got lost in it.
#44
What did the sketch book say to the novel? I’m drawing a blank.
#45
I had plans to begin reading a book about sinkholes, but they fell through.
#46
You had me at “I like books.”
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Do you have a book pun or pickup line that you love? Share with us in the comments below!