Things My Books Would Say If They Could Talk

Things My Books Would Say If They Could Talk

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If you’re a book lover, then books have probably infiltrated every aspect of your life. In fact, it’s probably hard for someone to find you without a book in your hand or a book nearby, on call. And through all this time, books have shared their stories with you like whispers drifting off the pages. But, have you ever wondered what books might say outside of their carefully constructed stories if books could talk? We have, and we’ve constructed some of the sentences we think our sassy novels might say to us. Do you think your books could relate to any of these?

#1

“I’m all for an early morning reading sesh, but could you please brush your teeth first?”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#2

“Why must you always pick the grimiest, greasiest food to eat while you read? I’ll never get all these Cheetos and chocolate smudges off my pages!”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#3

“Hello? Anyone out there? I’ve been left open, my spin is breaking, and I can’t breathe! Send help!”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#4

“Gee! It sure feels good to stretch my pages again after being stuck on that cramped shelf for ages.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#5

“Pardon me, but are you seriously taking a bath right now? You know I’m not water-proof right? Was that a splash? Ick, your fingers are so damp.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#6

“What? You’re shelving me next to that book? But I’m wayyy better than that wannabe story.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#7

“Oh, no. Please don’t tell me you’re going to try and cram yet another book onto this shelf.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#8

“Tee, hee. You’re tickling my pages.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#9

“It’s so nice to take a break from the bookshelf for a few days and take a turn around the house.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#10

“Hey, sweaty fingers, maybe it’s time we take this reading session inside for a bit.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#11

“Are you cheating on me? I saw the way you were looking at that other romance novel.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#12

“I love late night cuddles. Oh wait, why are your eyes drifting close? And now you’re drooling on my pages! Nice!”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#13

“Yes, I need to report some missing pages. They were last seen in the toddler’s hands.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#14

“Hey Mr. Big Shot Book. You just think you’re so great because you were on the New York Times Bestsellers list. But behind that gaudy, review-drenched cover, you’re just pages like the rest of us.”

Things my books would say if they could talk

#15

“Hey, fella, do you think we might be reading too close to the water? Cause I think we might be reading too close to the water.”

what would books say if they could talk

#16

“I’m so squashed! Don’t you think you might need another shelf before you try and squeeze another book in here?”what would books say if they could talk

#17

“So I’ve noticed that you’ve been buying new books everyday, and I’m just wondering when you might get back around to reading us?”
what would books say if they could talk

#18

“Help! I’m smothering beneath your TBR pile!”
what would books say if they could talk

#19

“I’m going in the purse! What fun! I wonder where we’re going?”

what would books say if they could talk

#20

“I see you going for my corner again. Don’t even think about dog-earing me again.  You know they invented bookmarks for a reason right? My poor, poor pages.”

what would books say if they could talk

#21

“What are you doing? Are you really skipping to the end? But you haven’t even made it through the first three chapters yet!”

what would books say if they could talk

#22

*Singing from the shelf as you walk by* “I could show you the world. Shining, shimmering, splen . . . And there they go . . . rats. I’ll never get read at this rate.”

what would books say if they could talk

You know what else my books would say if they could talk? That I really should stop downloading so many great free ebooks from Book Cave! They’re getting jealous that I’m spending so much time reading amazing books that I didn’t even have to pay for.

If you’d like to make your books jealous by getting your own ebook steals, check out Book Cave’s current selection of ebook deals and sign up for their personalized daily ebook deals email so that you never miss a deal!

What would your books say if they could talk? Share with us in the comments below!

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